5 Things to Consider After Incarceration

It can be difficult to face life once you’ve made a choice that drastically impacted your future and/or the people around you. However, we all have the ability to change and take actionable steps to be a better version of ourselves.

Despite whether you’ve been incarcerated for a short period of time, or for decades, adjusting to society with a record can come with a few challenges. As you continue reading, you will discover 5 tips that will make the road to redemption not seem so daunting.

5. Acceptance

One of the first actionable steps to redemption after incarceration is taking accountability for your choices. We all make mistakes, but the habits that led up to the point of catastrophe are vaguely talked about. It is important to take ownership for your actions and acknowledge that although life may throw us a bad hand at times, we must STILL play the hand we were dealt. Many people decide to take the easier route and overlook the possibility of the negative outcome; subsequently, they blame others for their misfortune. Understanding your role in the situation is viable to overcoming challenges that may present themselves in the future.

4. Family & Friends

Almost everyone has heard the phrase, “you are a product of your environment.” This phrase is absolutely true. The environment in which a person grows up has a great impact on person, sometimes positive and sometimes negative effects. An environment can range from places to people.

Let’s take a moment to think about your neighborhood and how you grew up. Did you come from a two parent household or a single parent household? Did your grandparents practically raise you as their own? Were your guardians stable or were people figuring things out as best as possible? All of the factors are pretty much out of our control. We cannot go back and change any of those things, but they still shape and mold us with our ways of thinking, how we behave, and ultimately many of the choices we make later down the line. Although you don’t have much of an influence on how you grow up, as an adult there are numerous ways you can influence your future positively.

How to do influence your future:

For starters- building stronger and healthier relationships with people.

Another common phrase we’ve heard is “show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” I’m sure if you own a car, you’ve taken it to get the oil changed, get the tires rotated, and even maybe even detailed. Maintenance of your car is important to maintain the longevity of its ability to get you from one place to another. It is important to reevaluate your close knit circle of people and reflect as to how they are helping you grow and reach your goals.

Here are a couple of questions to consider as you reflect on the friends, family, and people YOU CHOOSE to give your time to.

• Are my friends just like me?
• Is there anyone in my family that has a repeatedly gotten in trouble with the law?
• Do I enjoy high risk activities with my friends?
• Who can I depend on to give me the good, bad, and ugly?
• Why do I like to be around ____________ (family or friend)?
• Who wants to see me win?
• When did I feel most stable?
• Where are people that fit my future, not my current situation?
• Even though they are family, are they toxic to my future?

3. Life Skills

We are all born with specials gifts and talents, some talents revealed in our darkest moments. Every experience in life is a lesson. We develop certain skills throughout our entire life, from birth to right now, and to imagine this will constantly happen for our entire life is mind-provoking! Think about how much your life has changed from the beginning of your time. Maybe there are skills you cultivated in your past out of need for survival and now they no longer suite you. Maybe you’ve been a fanatic over specific sport ever since childhood. It could be possible you’ve always thought you’d be good at something, but never ventured off to do it… GIVE IT A TRY!

The more experiences you create, the more life skills you will build along the way. It is important to have a balance of intellectual, social, and emotional skills. So take a moment every once in awhile and reflect on the tools you’ve acquired in your toolbox. Do all of these skills serve you or are there some you may need to let go? Will you be willing to change and create new habits and skills? You have the tools you need to be successful!

2. Forgiveness

Simply forgive yourself and those things you cannot change. You have been incarcerated and there’s nothing you can do to go back in time and fix it. Going back to number 5- ACCEPTANCE. There were plenty of people incarcerated before you and there will be many more afterward, so don’t think this is the end for you. Sometimes forgiveness looks like removing toxicity from your life whether it be people, substances, habits, thoughts, and/ or behaviors.

Forgiveness looks like peace. It is not vengeful, vindictive, or manipulative.

1. Plan Ahead

As we know, having a plan seems to work for some and be a struggle for others. However, it can work for EVERYONE! It is crucial to have a plan after being incarcerated. Think about all of the lawyer fees, community service hours you need to complete, completing probation, court fees, among many other day to day things you will have on your plate. This can get hectic if you don’t plan ahead. The last tip is one of the most important because it is a life skill you can continue to develop. It will help you streamline and get more things accomplished. If you need help developing a plan there are plenty of resources available like LifeChangersinc.org