Knowing how to create a safe space for the ones you love

Life can be overwhelming and along with that comes stress. 

For the adults, we have forty hours in a week that’s spent at work. 

For the children, there’s forty hours in a week that’s spent at school. 

This also comes with the tasks assigned for after school and after work. 

At the end of the week when you take a step back from the busy-ness of it all, ask yourself “When do I have time for myself?” 

If my children wanted to come to me and speak about their busy school schedule and mental health, would they feel comfortable in doing so? 

If you’re finding it hard to have time for yourself, you may be finding it hard to have time for your loved ones at home as well. 

Creating a safe space at home is important for the mental and physical well-being of you AND your loved ones. 

Whether it’s just escaping the outside world or being able to have that judgement-free dialogue with your partner or your children or even your parents.  

Some things may be easier said than done. 

But it is possible to find some time throughout the week to unwind your feelings and thoughts or allow your loved ones to unwind and share their feelings and thoughts with you.  

Start by communicating to your family or partner that you are there to listen to them with no judgments. 

Allow them to feel safe around you and emotionally vulnerable to open up about their world and what they may deal with outside of the safe space that you all have created together.  

For children, maybe their bedroom is their safe space. 

Some children have diaries or journals that they can write in to unleash feelings that have been harbored.  

For some adults, maybe a den or their bedroom has been designed to unwind and think. 

Some adults have journals that they can write in to help organize their thoughts and responsibilities. 

These are all safe spaces. 

Whether it is just a journal, your bedroom, your home, your partner and/or family. 

These safe spaces are critical to the mental health of everyone, whether you are a teenager or an adult in your 30s.  

After the COVID-19 pandemic, going back into the world to go to work or school became harder than we expected. 

Most people were comfortable at home, in their safe spaces. 

This may have made it difficult for you to adjust to being sociable again and may have increased anxiety for you. 

This is because your home is where you can be without the stress of the outside world and there is where you’ve created that safe space.  

What if your safe space is multiple places or people? 

You can also have a safe space to talk and release your feelings when talking to a therapist in an office or room that is just shared between the two of you. 

Here you may be able to speak about topics that, at home, you may or may not feel comfortable fully diving into. 

The important part of creating a safe space for, not only yourself, but family and friends, is trust.  

Trust is a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. 

Once you have trust as a foundation, you can create that safe space at home with your family which is heavily encouraged.  

And if that trust has been broken, somehow, there are ways to try and mend your relationships.  

Seeing a family therapist may be a good idea for those kinds of situations.  

Listening to your loved ones can assure them that someone is there for them when they are feeling overwhelmed by life and that there is someone that cares and is willing to help them. 

You also need someone to be there for you in the same sense.  

Be the person to others that you need them to be for you.  

Mental health is real and if you are feeling that you don’t have that safe space at home, or anywhere else in the world, there are numbers to call or text. 

If you or someone that you know is in need of help with their mental health or just someone to talk to, call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).